Stupid things smart people say

Gajodhar walks into the double bedded E Block hostel straight into my room. The room is well ventilated. Properly lit.Doors wide open. He sees me playing counterstrike. He knows perfectly how important this is to me.
( 5 Bots against one human player
map = aim_headshot
mode = expert)
And then he defies all logic and asks "Sangatha hai kya? " (Is Sangatha here?)
So why the hell does he sulks away pissed off, when After checking inside the cupboard, below the cot, inside my pocket , under the mousepad I finally reply "Nahin, lagta hai Sangatha room main nahin hai :)" (seems like Sangatha is not here)
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We work in a group in Machines Lab on some mundane experiment that basically requires us to take a few readings of the Motor speed and Voltmeter and plot them on the graph paper and erase the points that don't lay on the plotted curve to get more marks :) ,
all of a sudden a girl from the next group comes and asks for a pen.
Well not only does she asks for it, she asks very politely. In Hindi "Excuse me, thoda sa pen de sakte ho please?"
(literally translated that'd mean, excuse me, can you give a bit of the pen please ?)
I slowly unscrew the pen and give her the refill with a grin. "Ye lo thoda sa pen" . She storms away and doesn't find it funny at all. Neither do my group mates.

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My friend (who's exactly my-kind-of-guy , counter strike playing and wise crack spewing) and me are eating silently in the Food Court. Its a weekend and understandably crowded. There are a few empty chairs near the table we sit at. And then this couple gets inside Food Court. The girl is smoking Hawt. The guy is tall , with a T shirt that screams "Lee" (we're like kiski lee??) side burns, goatee, piercing on the eye brows. iPod half jutting out of his jeans. Pretty much loaded we guess. The kind of guy who'd start all his sentences with "Dude" and sprinkle liberal ammount f**k in between

He looks at the empty chairs and then at us. "Dude (see i told you :) ) is there anybody sitting over here ?"
My pal replies "No, I don't think I can see one"
He then rephrases the question "Was there anyone sitting over here?"
Pat came the reply "Yeah I guess someone sat here"
"No Dude I mean will anyone be sitting over here ?"

This time we pay the bill and almost ready to go. Stare at the hawt chick (for the records she seemed totally uninterested) "Well its a chair you see , so we guess some one will sit here"
:)
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PS: names borrowed from Raju Srivastav to protect privacy

bored out of doing nothing-part II

A 24 hours first hand story of a final semester "single" VITian male suffering from "project semester" syndrome

I wake up at 7:00 am, it’s too early according to engineering standards, I agree but after sleeping at nine the previous day even sleeping seems a monotonous task. I have my breakfast amidst the relatively calm atmosphere of north Indian vegetarian mess, which is generally crowded in morning with hungry people with groggy and puffy eyes due to either over sleeping or night outs watching movies or playing DOTA, Counter Strike or FIFA over the LAN. I get back to room and wait patiently for the newspaper guy to deliver the newspaper so that I can while away another hour or so. With no fixed agenda to while away the time between newspaper browsing and lunch I read a few pages of novel or take a short shower. Finally the mess opens again for lunch, I have my lunch and move to the campus then while away some more time before snacks. I surf the net a bit in the lab, frankly there’s not much to browse as orkut and g talk are banned. Finally bored I move to library to read a few more magazines or to pick up a book to kill some more time at my room. After what seems like ages its 5 o’clock. 5 o’clock is a heaven on otherwise dry campus life out here in VIT. It’s a time when classes come to an end and couples and potentially single females roam around in the campus encouraging singles like us to loiter around braving the hot sun. Finally the day comes to an end and I move to mess again to have my last meal of the day. By the time I reach room one of my roommates is smart enough to get a movie or an episode of roadies or big bang theory or even sa-re-ga-ma-pa to while away the time till mid night. Finally another day comes to an end and I think of new ways to kill the next day lying on the bed.

P.S- if it’s Saturday we watch a movie in hall for a change

Believe me friends it’s tougher doing nothing than pretending to be busy doing something

Political rhetorics and cheap gimmicks

Hiya,
Election is just round the corner for a change.(generally it's always exams round the corner!!) So as an average Indian citizen its hilarious to read snippets the daily newspaper, and no I'm not talking about the comic section. Take a look at the recent ignited minds of Indian Political Parties coming up with innovative election manifesto (after probably weeks of brainstorming i guess):

Samajwadi Party vows to do away with Machines, computers and abolish English: (stunned ? read on)


samajwadi party, a party that describes itself as a democratic socialist party claimed that if a new government were to be formed with Samajwadi party's support it'd advocate for the following changes:

1.Abolish use of English in education and schools providing "expensive educations"

2.Scrap use of computer in new projects.

3. Ban the use of mechanized farming, that includes harvesters, tractors.

All the above moves are supposedly done to provide employment to millions of labourers and generate jobs.


And Mulayam Singh Yadav's UP legislative assembly claims he has done his M.A, B.T from Agra University, Agra (Uttar Pradesh) (for credentials check here --> http://uplegassembly.nic.in/mulayamsinghyadav.html)

i don't think this post needs much to comment. But it's hilarious :)

Pictionary

Happy New year folks!!

Ok this post is pretty late but i had thought about it really long back, and i was dying to do some serious goofing up...

Q: So wat do u make out of this picture?

(hint: himesh reshmiya)

hint: latest movie (2008 release actually)

hint: latest craze among rikshawwallah and autowallah

ok ok:

Ans: tandoori knights !!

*super sarcastic mode on*

ok Himesh Reshmiya u deserve a GPL for this, i mean dude (wtf!!) i mean at one point of time i could really empathise with u, not appreciate you, but appreciate the fact that you worked hard for your roti-kapda-makaan-hairstyle. In fact when you shouted superb mindblowing fantastic history day in and day out in Sa-Re-Ga-Ma-Pa, i could still wince through your limited vocabulary.When u started singing your own songs i could still bear with it, but now seriously dude, Tandoori nights, really? (think about it!)And the more important question, what next dude, what next?Are u gonna shell out songs with Catchy lyrics like:

rava dosa days?

masala papad dawn??

sahi paneer afternoon???

dehati chicken dawn?

did u take the "love him or hate him u can't avoid himesh reshmiya" thing too seriously?

i mean why the f*** should i listen to your tandoori nights rather than pritam's shamelessly plagarised songs?

come on man, get over it... make something that makes sense, and happy new year to you too.. (no grudges, just a suggestion !!)